Editors note: the author has defined the terms labeled with a asterisk at the end of this blog as well as added some additional footnotes for context.*
It feels strange to be writing this because no one has ever asked me how I handle Ramadan as a Type-1 Diabetic.
Or as a person with only one Muslim parent.
Or anything about Ramadan if I’m being honest.
For so long most people assumed I didn't participate because of the assumption that Diabetics can’t fast. In my experience, when non-Muslim Americans hear Ramadan there’s usually two types of responses. They’ve either never heard of Ramadan or they associate it with fasting strictly from food. So I will attempt to clarify Ramadan for you in this blog.
Ramadan is the ninth month of the Islamic Calendar year where able-bodied Muslims fast from sun-up to sun-down. They fast from food, drink, smoking, and sexual activity. That includes water. Muslims observe the holiday for the entire month within their communities and it’s considered a must or fard for most Muslims with some exceptions. The Quran was revealed during this month and is the reason why we try so hard to spend this time growing closer to our God, Allah (swt). Many people also spend the month growing closer as a community or family.
For most of my childhood we would celebrate Ramadan at the Masjid* with my Dad. My Dad immigrated to America in 1983 and doesn’t have immediate family in the states so our community became the Masjid. In Islam, men and women are seperated into different spaces or sections.
This sounds kinda sus, but if you really think about it what girl wants a bunch of stinky boys in their space? When the space is limited the men will sit in front of the women, facing forward towards Mecca, to provide a sense of privacy. When I was really young, the Masjid we went to was also small so it wasn't big enough for separate sections. I was little so I'd just sneak over to where the men sat and be with my Baba; nobody really minded. Thinking back, I remember Ramadans where the men made sure the women's section was served their food first while the athan was going in the background, calling everyone for prayer and my dad would let me sit right next to him on the floor, hand me dates and little cups of pink milk to break our fast before I’d run back to the women’s side for the prayer, throw on my little hijab and join the women.
I think Ramadan can mean a lot of things to different people but for me, it’s the season of mercy. When I was diagnosed with Diabetes, the small experience I had with Ramadan dramatically changed. I was 8 at diagnosis, so I had only begun fasting the year before and even then it was just for practice, 4 or 5 hours here or there. No one expects a child that small to actually fast but practicing to get in the habit was normal*. After my diagnosis, my parents switched me to a public school so I’d have one-on-one access to a school nurse. I wasnt in my regular Islamic School environment like I was used to. I would still go to iftar, the dinner served to break the fast, at the masjid with my dad and siblings but it felt different. I didn't get to be with my friends all day, I missed the special Islamic Studies classes we'd take to ask Brother Hassan, my Islamic Studies teacher and preferred person to bug with my incessant religious questions, or sing Ramadan songs. As I got older, sneaking to my dad’s side got harder and more frowned upon. It felt like all the fun stuff about Ramadan and going to the Masjid wasnt a thing for me because Diabetes and getting older had pretty much taken it all away from me. A particular day at Sunday School, I remember asking Brother Hassa why Allah (swt) was mad at me. It felt like he didn’t want me to fit in anywhere. Each time I felt I was understanding life a little more, the rug would get swept out from under me. Brother Hassan explained to me that Allah (swt) wasnt mad at me. In fact, Allah (swt) had remembered me and those like me in the ayas of Surah Al Baqarah:
“And as for those who can fast with difficulty, (e.g. an old man), they have (a choice either to fast or) to feed a Miskeen (poor person) (for every day)”
[al-Baqarah 2:184]
What? This wasn't about me? This was for someone old right? How could I feed someone? I was just a kid. Brother Hassan explained to me that it was okay, I wasnt expected to yet. I was a child. When I was of age, It would be expected for me to participate by feeding a hungry person. I felt a little better but I was a persistent (and somewhat annoying) child. How did he know this was about me? Wouldn't Allah (swt) want me to push myself to really suffer like people who truly have nothing to eat or drink like he had told us in class? I was young, not an old man! Brother Hassan recited
“Allah does not burden a soul beyond that it can bear”
[al-Baqarah 2:286]
“It’s okay that you can’t fast,” he said. “There are other things you can do. You can read the Quran, You can work on meeting your prayers steadfastly, You can feed poor people.” There were so many ways for me to be close to Allah during this month in my own way and still be a part of my community. He explained to me that even when I was older there would be times I couldn’t fast.
I pushed harder.
Why wouldn’t I just push myself? He told me that God had made these allowances for me for a reason and that taking care of myself and my body above all else was important*. When I was older, I eventually found out that Women are not expected to fast on their periods OR PRAY! Allah (swt) allows for Women to take a break. I learned to see this as merciful. A God who thinks about what is being asked of you and your ability to meet it. For me it didn't get more merciful than that.
As an adult in a Islamic Marriage of my own, I find my own ways to celebrate Ramadan especially in our current COVID climate. I have iftar with my husband at home and on Sundays we have iftar with my Dad and brothers. On Mondays, we have iftar with my husband’s parents and sisters. It’s nice that we still get to have a sense of community within our family units even if we’re not gathering at the mosque like we did before COVID.
During Ramadan my husband and I try our best to read the Quran more, watch TV less, and be as grateful as possible for the things we do have because there are so many people who have to live without some of the simple things in life. A roof, somewhere to sleep. Food to eat. People to love. Insulin to use(!). The technology of continuous glucose monitors and transplants being developed further everyday. Surviving a pandemic. Simple things that in the grand scheme of everything maybe aren’t so simple after all.
For those of you celebrating Ramadan this year with your loved ones, I hope your lives are filled with happiness and joy and may Allah (swt) accept all of your prayers and fasting! Ramadan Kareem!
*Masjid is the arabic word for Mosque which is defined as a Muslim Place of worship as defined by Merriam-Websters dictionary.
*Athan is one of the many variations of the word azan which is defined by Merriam Websters dictionary as the Muslim call to ritual prayer, typically made by a muezzin from the minaret of a mosque.
*The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “The Pen has been lifted from three: from the sleeping person until he wakes up, from the minor until he grows up, and from the insane person until he comes to his senses.” [Narrated by Abu Dawood (4403), al-Tirmidhi (1423), al-Nasaa’i (3432) and Ibn Majaah (2041).] Brother Hassan explained that Allah had made exceptions for people and explained this quote to me.
*And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: ‘Allah likes you to avail yourselves of His concessions as He hates you to disobey Him.” [Narrated by Imam Ahmad (5839) and classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Irwa’ al-Ghaleel (564)]. This was a story told to be at a later time by someone.
